Cody’s Column: Concert Etiquette 101

By Cody Fitzgerald
Campus News

This year has been incredibly unkind on my bank account, or at least that’s been my deflection for my incredibly poor spending habits that I should probably be taking full responsibility for. In reality, the concert circuit has been absolutely incredible this year, albeit insanely expensive. So, as midterms roll in and inevitably get abhorrently political once again, I want to stay lighthearted and give you some tips and tricks I’ve learned through so many concerts, caked off with my undying hatred of rude people and concerts.

Step 1 – Arrival
You made it. You fought Ticketmaster for three hours two months ago just hoping you’d get to experience this moment. You harassed your friends for months trying to find someone who would go, just for this moment. You got in a really sketchy Uber that may or may not have been the Uber you were looking for, for this moment. Now it sucks.

It’s important to note for first time people, general admission means people in the standing room, NOT the “general audience.” You will waste time doing this. Also, if you brought pepper spray for that inevitable Uber experience, remember that it is technically a weapon and is going to be thrown out by security.

Now you’re in, make sure you enjoy the show, grab your snacks, and use the bathroom BEFORE the show starts.

Step 2 – The Show
If you’ve survived the hellscape that is entering the venue, now you can sit back, relax, and enjoy the show, except you cannot. I get it, I am not a dancer. I’d much rather enjoy the show than be embarrassing myself in front of everyone around me, but please know that this is unavoidable.

It’s also important to watch who you are around. Now, I know sometimes you have assigned seats, but if you can avoid the following, its for the best. Here’s a list of people that I think deserve the death penalty:

  • People who record the ENTIRE concert. I get it, you want a video. However, you should take one and just enjoy the show, and I guarantee you no one actually watches your 10-minute Snapchat story.
  • People who loudly sing every word to every song. It’s very natural to want to sing along, but if I can hear you over the artist I wish you nothing but the worst.
  • People who bring their child to the show. I love kids, it’s cute, yes. The effect wears off, however, and your screaming child that is probably stressed beyond belief and definitely catching COVID does not need to be on your shoulders and blocking my view.

Now, for yourself, you’re going to want to make sure that you get your videos and photos. I’d recommend two to three videos, and one video of your favorite song, tops. You also need to make sure that you’re not obstructing anyone’s view with your phone camera, because then you too deserve the death penalty.

Step 3 – Leaving the Show
Pray.

Cody Fitzgerald aspires to become “one of the cool” High School English teachers. He attends Siena College as an Education major and hopes to share this outlook/coping mechanism with future generations.

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